Blog #7

In class, we’ve been working on the subject of flash fiction. Image result for book aestheticPersonally, I found this difficult and I’ve decided that I do not enjoy working on these. Although it is not my strong suit, I enjoy reading them. As I read my classmates’ work, I find myself rather impressed with a freshman’s work in my class. I mention that she’s a freshman, because the work is something you’d expect from a professor or an older soul. The idea and concept that she came up with is disheartening, yet beautiful. I would like to analyze her work for this assignment, so without further a do, here is Kimmy’s flash fiction…


As I feel the cold words of the lawyer telling us that we were being put into foster care, I tremble.
The hardest day in my life was the day I decided to isolate myself from everyone I was close to. I stopped talking to everyone. I made my brother stop talking to everyone. We sat alone at lunch, we walked together in the halls. Just the two of us. No one to confide in.


I really enjoy and appreciate the way this opener is worded. The way that she described the lawyer’s words gives a lot more interpretation for the environment of the court room. By simply describing the reveal of the jury as a cold presents gives a dark, almost heartbreaking presence. As the narrator reflects on the events that leads up why she is being put into foster home, the feelings of pain remains and intensifies.

 


“It’s for the best.” I would tell myself and my brother whenever there was a small doubt, which was almost everyday.

 


The simplicity of the dialogue allows the reader to interpret that the few words spoken were very difficult to admit. Even though the narrator doubts herself, it is given that she only keeps her head up for the sake of her brother.


 

No one knew. It was just me and my brother. Living on our own. Keeping our big secret. We told no one. Who found out? Who could do this? Sure it has been the hardest three and a half years without a mom and dad, Image result for liar aesthetic photobut we were doing fine. Our attendance was average, we were not failing, we have stayed out of trouble, we have kept a low profile. Maybe people got suspicious.



The question of the narrator allows the reader to interpret or have their own personal ideas on how the children got caught. This emphasizes the over all feeling of betrayal and pain. Since the children did the best that they could to be good students, it adds to the feeling of the undeserving punishment that the kids will endure.


Life before the accident was great. It was me, the girl who everyone knew, and who knew everyone. I was confident and fearless. And, my brother, the football and track star. My boyfriend Max, best friend Maya, and brother James, would always be with me. It was just the four of us, always doing anything to hangout and have a good time.

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Since life seemed and felt perfect to the siblings before the tragic event involving their parents, the empathy and pain we feel for the children is enhanced. Their lives were ideal prior to the death of their parents, but as time goes, it clearly seems to get worse.


Now, my best friend and boyfriend are together. I’m happy for them. Maya and I ended on good terms, meaning we simply drifted apart and that’s Image result for typing text gifthat. Max on the other hand, did not approve of mine and James’ “ghosting”. He was in love with me, and I was in love with him. He told me he was only with Maya to make me jealous. I forced myself and James to block them and stay away from them, but sometimes I see them talking. They didn’t understand why we had to stop being friends with them, but I couldn’t tell them.

 


Although the narrator claims to be fine with the conditions of her boyfriend and best friend, the grievance still has a part played in this section. The narrator has no one but her brother, so she shuts her friends out in hopes of being safer. Now that the siblings are now being put into foster care, the idea she originally had backfired, and her life continues to go downhill.


It’s over now. Before at least we had each other and the house. Now, we are going to have to be separated. I can’t loose one more person I love. First my dog, then my parents, then my friends, and now my brother. No one could come between us. I cannot let this happen. We have to go. We have to leave and get out of this small town right now. Before it’s too late.

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I found myself appreciating this last snip of Kimmy’s work. Even though the perspective is written and spoken like a younger child, the last sentence shows how far she has come. Although all of the young child’s hopes were crushed, she still has motivation to fight. Overall, the feel of this work is bittersweet. No younger child should have to feel or go through the things the narrator describes and endures. The situation is probably much more complicated than many situations grow adults go through. Since Kimmy had to put herself in the shoes of a soon to be foster child, I believe she did a great job interpreting the rushing thoughts and flashbacks to the leading events in hopes to understand where she went wrong. Although some may not find the same appreciation as I, I think this is a fantastic piece. Great job Kimmy.

 


For this assignment, we’ve been asked to write an alternative ending to the flash fiction we chose to analyze. Although I believe Kimmy nailed the ending, here is my alternative ending:

The burden of life has really taken its time on devouring my every ounce of hope. I am loosing everything as the days go by: my friends, my parents, and now my brother. When mom and dad passed away, we promised each other we would do anything to stick together. I’m keeping that promise, even if I have to join Mom and Dad.

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Although my twist on it is far more dark and not as wholesome, I would think that one who’s going through such a difficult time would be very desperate for liberation. As many people say, “desperate times comes with desperate measures.” It also seems to bring the twist of the younger child to life. It brings the idea of harsh reality of life to attention through the gruesome idea of doing whatever she must to escape the hell the child endures. Kimmy’s work is a contradiction to most, for it really dives into the mind of an anxious and confused child. Even though the child’s thoughts may be simple, they tend to be accurate in the eyes of one who was recently a former child. Even if a child was put into a dense situation, they wouldn’t be able to grasp the idea of what the actual situation may be. Even though this could be quite offensive or arguable, I stand by my point of Kimmy’s work is unique and the concept is original. If you would like to go see more of Kimmy’s, please visit her site and give her the credit she deserves.

Kimmy’s Blog

 

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